February 2010

February 2010 was a bit of a roller coaster ride for me.

It started of very well. I ended up getting some work writing articles. The problem is, unlike my website that I can work on in any free moment of the day, the articles have deadlines.

Michelle started getting verbally abusive toward Charlotte and I, and was making it nearly impossible for me to work on any of my articles or the website.

After a few episodes of being exposed to her binge drinking and verbal assaults, I decided that it was no longer safe to live with her, and sent Charlotte to stay with friends until I could find another place for us to live.

All of this stress was causing me severe anxiety that was spiraling into depression. I slowly started to lose my drive, and had to coax myself out of bed every day. I had a few people to talk to about my situation, which helped a lot.

I was lucky enough to find a safe place to live with friends that also needed some help. I have to admit that I was really scared for a few days. But it all worked out right before Michelle came into my room and told me that I was obviously leaving, and she wanted me out that night amongst a few insults.

I was actually kind of relieved, because I didn’t want to be there anymore, and was only planning to stay a few more nights. But the very idea of moving sets off my anxiety like a bomb, and I was shaking the whole time I was packing even though I felt good about doing it.

She was nice enough to help me pack and drive me and my belongings to my friend’s house. I’ve been a lot calmer since we’ve been here, and I recently picked up another job writing product reviews.

I also met a nice man that asked me to be his Valentine. We went out for dinner and a movie (Valentine’s Day) and had a great time.

It’s funny how change can happen so quickly. This time I think it’s another change for the better.